Deck the Halls with Fouls

There is so much to tell you...I do not know where to begin, but I will try to keep it as short as I can. These past three days have been a roller coaster for me. The first two the family was down in Myrtle Beach, SC. It was so much fun! Tino and I walked the beach at night, jumped in the pool the next day (which was freezing cold), and played Dance Central on the XBox 360. I also met "The Jones(es)." Pastor Jones has sixteen kids, all of which came. They were all respectful and so well behaved. I got to know his older children that were close to my age. I still couldn't break through to my cousin. I shared a room with her. She would stare, but did not say a word. Her baby boy ZaNoah is so beautiful. My dad could not come because his probation is up in 60 days and they are not quite finished yet. I suppose that was a good thing. When we got home he was yelling and physically threatening my grandma. I was scared a little. He even revealed some of his feelings about me and I have done nothing to the man...I hardly know him. I have discovered that my father "loves me," but he does not like me. I remind him too much of his mother and I love that women so much. If I have ever seen an evil spirit I saw it in him last night. I was not starring @ him, but I could hear it in his voice, I could feel it in the air. Grandma had to call the police and dad left. I feel like everything he told me was a lie. He was saying that he wanted to stay celibate until he got married, yet he is running off to be with some woman in Georgia. Am I mad at him? No. We are all only human, we make mistakes, but I do not want/like/need to be around a confused, insecure, mad man when I am young, Black, and beautiful! lol but Seriously, before he got here it was peaceful and loving...now I have to hold my tongue in fear that I might offend him. Why am I sharing this with you...well 1)I told you I would be honest and share what is going on in my life during my college years, 2) I want to speak to situations that may be going on in your life. My advice to you, don't you EVER let someone threaten you and/or disrespect you, IF you have done nothing wrong. Even if you have, you do not have to tolerate someone yelling down your throat, and/or beating you up mentally, physically, or emotionally. I saw the devil last night. I really did. He is mad, because the Lord has a lot in store for me and my family. I am not scared and I will not stand for it. My, my how times change, yet stay the same. Here is my father a 40+ year old man who cannot let go of his anger to save his poor, confused life...not even enough to love me completely or to just live a peaceful life. Do not feel sorry for me...I am alright and as a matter of fact I am still happy. The one thing I have not learned yet it how to make a depressed person feel better. When I am in a room with one, I freeze up and go somewhere else, because as I have told you, I need to be around folks who love and laugh. It is not hard, you just have to learn to forgive people for the wrong they have done to you and move on. Life is too short and the world is too small. Till next time...